The old Windmill

TUMBY: There used to be a windmill there at the end of the promenade you know, Bert.

ME: Really?

TUMBY: Oh Yeah. Big one too. Proper one, you know.

ME: What happened to it?

TUMBY: Billy Butlin knocked it down to build the amusement park. Wanker.

PEGGY: Best thing he ever did.

TUMBY: Whad’ya mean? That amusement park was shite. Still is.

PEGGY: I know. But… I just hate windmills. They give me the creeps.

TUMBY: You hate windmills? How can a windmill give you the creeps? They’re lovely old things.

PEGGY: No they’re not. They’re creepy *shudders*

TUMBY: You’re mad. I grew up here with that windmill. I used to sell matches in front of it and do tricks for the holiday-makers. Charley Ferris used to be out front of it with his monkey. I climbed it once for a bet.

ME: What, the monkey?

TUMBY: No, you top hat. The windmill. I fell off and cracked me coccyx.

PEGGY: See? Windmills are evil. Sinister, dark horrible things. Best thing Billy Butlin ever did.

TUMBY: Blimey, Peggy, what was Camberwick Green, then, a horror movie?

PEGGY: (laughs) It bloody was to me!

TUMBY: You mad old bint!

ME: I’ve got to go, you two. See you later. Hope your ankles go down, Peggy.

PEGGY: Some hope. See ya, Bert


About Bert

On the fringes
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2 Responses to The old Windmill

  1. kate smart says:

    Possibly the best blog I’ve ever seen. Seriously.

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